Galatians & being Kind to Annoying people

Two weeks ago, Maddie preached about ​Kindness as part of our sermon series “Cultivating Fruits of the Spirit.” Together, we examined the challenges of being kind when someone is deeply, maddeningly annoying. To do that, we took a look at four people who have received a lot of internet backlash for coming across as “annoying”: Bean Dad, Feral Hogs Guy, Lena Dunham, Taylor Swift. These are people who get flattened into tropes — too cringey, too earnest, too much — and therefore, in our minds, not deserving of kindness.

But Galatians tells a different story. In this letter to a young, divided church, Paul insists that belonging is not earned by performance, status, or cultural respectability. It’s given freely by the Spirit. And what the Spirit produces in us, Paul says, is not gatekeeping or elitism — but love, joy, peace, kindness, and more.

This week, I want to offer you two resources that deepen and expand that message:

1. “Is Annoyance the Most Romantic Emotion?” – The Cut
This smart, funny essay explores annoyance as an overlooked but essential emotional force in daily life — especially in our homes and relationships. The author argues that annoyance isn’t the opposite of love; in fact, it might be what love looks like in real life. You can only be annoyed by someone you’re still in relationship with — someone close enough to interrupt your routine, your expectations, your control.

The piece suggests that in a world obsessed with efficiency and emotional tidiness, annoyance might be the last honest sign that we still care. We’re annoyed because we haven’t checked out. We’re still showing up. And maybe that means kindness isn’t about eliminating annoyance — but about holding it tenderly, without flattening the people around us.

If you've ever found yourself thinking, “I wouldn’t be so irritated if I didn’t love these people so much,” this article is for you.

2. “Doing the Right Thing” – Mary Anderson (The Christian Century)
In Maddie’s sermon, we looked at Paul’s letter to the Galatians as a radical argument against sorting people into “worthy” and “unworthy.” In that early Christian community, the dividing line was circumcision. Today, it might be tone, taste, vibe, or who we find cringey. Paul’s response then and now is the same: the Spirit doesn’t draw those lines. The Spirit bears fruit.

Mary Anderson’s reflection on Galatians 6 picks up this same thread. She focuses on Paul’s charge: “Let us not grow weary in doing what is right.” And she reminds us: doing what is right in Christian community is exhausting.

Why? Because, just like in biological families, we don’t get to choose the members of the body of Christ. Anderson writes that baptism means we are bound to people we didn’t select — people with different values, habits, and ways of being. And that’s where kindness becomes spiritual work.

Anderson beautifully names the tension at the heart of Galatians: a church trying to figure out who really belongs, and Paul insisting that in Christ, the dividing walls are gone. The Spirit doesn’t wait for people to clean themselves up. The Spirit arrives first — and the fruit grows later.

So when we feel ourselves growing weary — when kindness feels hard or impossible — Paul’s words remind us that this isn’t a sign of failure. It’s evidence that we’re doing the slow, faithful work of love. And Anderson encourages us to trust that, even when it’s messy, it’s worth it.

Reflect & Practice:

• Who in your life is “in the family” — through faith, baptism, or relationship — but hard to love right now?
  
  
• How do you respond to people who annoy you — not because they’re harmful, but because they’re different?
  
  
• How might you hold your annoyance without flattening the other person?
  
  
• What would it look like to see them as whole — and to choose kindness anyway?

Annoyance, it turns out, might be the friction that makes love real. Kindness, Paul says, is the fruit that grows when we stop drawing lines between "acceptable" and "not worth our time." And doing the right thing, as Mary Anderson reminds us, means showing up for people even when we’re tired, annoyed, or tempted to write them off. Because the Spirit doesn’t.