Connecting Through Conversation

At the River, every couple months we use a special service format that we call Conversation Church! Instead of hearing a sermon, we engage with one another through intentional, guided conversations. So often at church we sit side by side without truly getting to know one another. But during Conversation Church, as we sit around tables and approach conversation as a spiritual practice, we have the opportunity to learn about one another, to make new friends, and to deepen connections.

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During the first round we typically start with introductions. We ask questions like:

• What is your name?
• What are your preferred pronouns? (optional)
• Where do you live?

• How was your journey to church this morning?

• How long have you been attending the River?

• If you have been attending for a while, what are some things you enjoy/appreciate about the church?

• If you have joined us recently, what led you to the River?

Then, as the prompts progress, conversation deepens.

​Below are some of the questions we've discussed during recent Conversation Church services. Consider using them to help you start a meaningful conversation with a friend, family member, coworker, or neighbor!
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• Where in NYC have you not been yet that you’d like to explore? What interests you about it? Or, where in NYC do you like to take friends/family when they come to visit? Why there?


• Is there a joy or passion in your life that you rarely talk about? If so, what is it? What do you love about it? If not, please share about any joy or passion in your life!

 

• Is there a story behind your given name or your surname? If you have a nickname or a chosen name, how is this name meaningful to you?

 

• Share a memory related to food — a family recipe, a baking ritual, or a time of breaking bread with loved ones.

 

• Who’s someone you really admire? What do you admire about them? How has admiring this person helped to shape you?

 

• Share a story about a day in your life that you’ll never forget. What happened that day? How did you feel? Why does it continue to stick with you

 

• What is something (big or small) that you are you looking forward to right now? Today? This week? This month? This year? Share a bit about why this is something you are looking forward to.

 

• What brings you joy these days? What weighs heavy on you, or causes you grief?

 

• In the past week, when did you feel most alive? (consolation) In the past week, when did you feel the life draining out of you? (desolation)

 

• What does “life in all its fullness” — or abundant life — mean to you? What does it look, feel, sound, smell, and taste like?

 

• What helps you to feel grounded, rooted, calm, and/or at peace?

 

• During this season, what are some of the sticking points in your life and/or in your faith? 

 

• Are there any questions you are wrestling with when it comes to faith/spirituality?

 

• What is a topic you would like to hear a sermon about?

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Below are some of our favorite quotes about conversation. We hope that you will find them inspiring and relatable!

​“The most important thing in all human relationships is conversation, but people don’t talk anymore, they don’t sit down to talk and listen. They go to the theater, the cinema, watch television, listen to the radio, read books, but they almost never talk. If we want to change the world, we have to go back to a time when warriors would gather around a fire and tell stories.”
— Paulo Coelho (lyricist and novelist)

​“Love without conversation is impossible.”
— Mortimer Adler (philosopher and lay theologian)

​"A real conversation always contains an invitation. You are inviting another person to reveal herself or himself to you, to tell you who they are or what they want."
— David Whyte (poet)

"Conversation doesn’t have to lead to consensus about anything, especially not values; it’s enough that it helps people get used to one another."
— Kwame Anthony Appiah (philosopher and writer)

“Find hard to talk to stranger. Terrible at chit-chat. Think people look at me funny then I start panic think have to be clever all of time. They not understand I artist, not entertainer! Magic of Bigfoot what happen when people not looking.”
— Graham Roumieu, Me Write Book: It Bigfoot Memoir